7 Steps To Save A Relationship

7 Steps to Save a Relationship

Jim works long hours and Liz doesnt feel he is there for her. Liz spends all of her time meeting the need of the children and Jim feels that she doesnt have time left over for him and his needs. Can this relationship be saved? Should it be saved? Heres how to save a relationship.
Each partner in the relationship must decide if it is worth saving. With hard work most relationships can be saved, but the work must be done by both partners. If one partner decides they don't want to try, not much can be done to avoid a split.
Many people stay in a relationship because it is convenient. Or they remain in a marriage because of the children. But that is not enough. How to save a relationship starts with a commitment by both parties that the relationship is worth saving.
Now you need to focus on the real problems in the relationship. Problems create many symptoms, and it is easy to think the symptoms are the problem. But that is not the case.
Perhaps an affair has caused great pain in your relationship. This is a symptom. Normally an affair indicates a lack of intimacy. If this is not repaired, problems will persist. The cheating partner might feel guilty and stop the affair, but other problems will pop up (like pornography) unless the core problem, lack of intimacy, is fixed. Deal with core issues rather than symptoms, and you can save the relationship.
Once you have isolated the core problems you need to talk about them. Each partner needs to talk and each partner needs to listen. Hold hands while you talk. Don't make accusations. Talk about how you feel. If your partner says something that hurts, remember that they are not trying to be hurtful. Each partner's motive should be to improve the relationship.
Now its time to work together to solve your problems. Design an action plan and follow it. If your problem is not spending enough time together, agree to spend 20 or 30 minutes each day talking, perhaps before bedtime. If the problem is you don't spend enough time together, designate a date night each week. Take turns deciding new and interesting places to go. Stick to your plan.
Remember, saving a relationship is a process. At times you will take two steps forward, but one step backwards. You will laugh and you will cry. Be patient. Be quick to apologize and slow to place blame. This is your relationship and if it is worth saving, take the steps to save it!